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EP- 89 – அன்பளிப்பு…Where’s
the Gift?… - Greatness Series - Zero
to Hero 100 days Personal Transformation Journey
the Gift?… - Greatness Series - Zero
to Hero 100 days Personal Transformation Journey
We are in Episode 89.
இந்த
YouTube channel லை வாழ வைக்கும் தெய்வங்களாகிய எல்லா
ஹீரோயின்களுக்கும், ஹீரோக்களுக்கும் இனிய புத்தாண்டு நல் வாழ்த்துக்கள்.
YouTube channel லை வாழ வைக்கும் தெய்வங்களாகிய எல்லா
ஹீரோயின்களுக்கும், ஹீரோக்களுக்கும் இனிய புத்தாண்டு நல் வாழ்த்துக்கள்.
As we have completed all the 7 Habits of Stephen Covey, I want take up
“Greatness Series” to address other best behaviours, habits, simplifying tools,
good books, Videos, TED Talks and resources.
“Greatness Series” to address other best behaviours, habits, simplifying tools,
good books, Videos, TED Talks and resources.
Today’s Book is “Where’s my Gift” from Nigel Bristow. It has 4.1 rating in goodreads.com. I
dedicate this episode to Kavitha who has suggested this book to me. Hats off to
Kavitha, my sister.
dedicate this episode to Kavitha who has suggested this book to me. Hats off to
Kavitha, my sister.
About the Author:-
Nigel Bristow is an international career consultant and speaker who
works with individuals and organizations to promote career vitality. He is
dedicated to helping people increase their effectiveness and satisfaction at
work. He has consulted with organizations around the world, such as 3M, Boeing,
Fidelity Investments, and Textron.
works with individuals and organizations to promote career vitality. He is
dedicated to helping people increase their effectiveness and satisfaction at
work. He has consulted with organizations around the world, such as 3M, Boeing,
Fidelity Investments, and Textron.
He is the author of
·
Building
Communities of Learning: How to harness the collective genius of the people in
your organization;
Building
Communities of Learning: How to harness the collective genius of the people in
your organization;
·
Flying
the Coop: Liberating ourselves from the mindsets that limit our potential and
rob us of fulfilment; and
Flying
the Coop: Liberating ourselves from the mindsets that limit our potential and
rob us of fulfilment; and
·
Strategies
for Career Success.
Strategies
for Career Success.
Nigel Bristow was born and educated in South Africa before immigrating to
the United States.
the United States.
Where’s the Gift? Is a parable that reveals powerful truths
about learning from the insights of others.
about learning from the insights of others.
In Where’s the Gift? You’ll learn why the only unhelpful feedback is no
feedback. You’ll also learn how to:
feedback. You’ll also learn how to:
·
Always find
the hidden gift in feedback.
Always find
the hidden gift in feedback.
·
Get the
timely feedback and information you need to achieve your goals.
Get the
timely feedback and information you need to achieve your goals.
·
Deal with
feedback that is either vague or unfair.
Deal with
feedback that is either vague or unfair.
·
Build relationships
so that if someone has a concern involving you, you’ll be the first, not the
last, to know.
Build relationships
so that if someone has a concern involving you, you’ll be the first, not the
last, to know.
·
Help those
around you to become your most effective coaches.
Help those
around you to become your most effective coaches.
·
Turn harsh
critics into strong allies.
Turn harsh
critics into strong allies.
·
Turn mistakes
into stepping stones for success.
Turn mistakes
into stepping stones for success.
This story is written for people in all walks of life. It takes less
than an hour to read, but the unique insights you’ll gain will bless you for a
lifetime.
than an hour to read, but the unique insights you’ll gain will bless you for a
lifetime.
Four Steps to Receiving the
Gift of Feedback
Gift of Feedback
1. Acknowledge the Gift.
·
Say “thank
you.”
Say “thank
you.”
·
Assume
that you’re about to discover something of value.
Assume
that you’re about to discover something of value.
2. Open the Box and Seek the Gift.
·
Sometimes
the gift is hard to find in the packaging material.
Sometimes
the gift is hard to find in the packaging material.
·
To find
the gift, ask lots of questions and really listen with an open mind.
To find
the gift, ask lots of questions and really listen with an open mind.
·
Don’t explain
yourself – at least not until after Step 3 when you understand the feedback and
the giver believes you understand.
Don’t explain
yourself – at least not until after Step 3 when you understand the feedback and
the giver believes you understand.
3. Acknowledge the Nature and the Value of the
Gift Inside.
Gift Inside.
·
Put
into words what you understand the gift to be (summarize)
Put
into words what you understand the gift to be (summarize)
·
Mention
how you plan to use it (if you can at this point)
Mention
how you plan to use it (if you can at this point)
·
If
appropriate, share your feelings or reviews (but only if you can do so without
coming across as defensive).
If
appropriate, share your feelings or reviews (but only if you can do so without
coming across as defensive).
4. Use the Gift.
·
When
you use it and experience the benefits of the gift, let the giver know how it
has helped you.
When
you use it and experience the benefits of the gift, let the giver know how it
has helped you.
·
If you
can’t use the gift immediately, simply say “thank you” and put it on a shelf
until you discover a use for it.
If you
can’t use the gift immediately, simply say “thank you” and put it on a shelf
until you discover a use for it.
Lessons learnt from my feedback:-
·
We all
expect only our manager’s should give the feedback. In fact, we can talk
feedback from anyone to shape us as Heroes and Heroines.
We all
expect only our manager’s should give the feedback. In fact, we can talk
feedback from anyone to shape us as Heroes and Heroines.
·
The two
worst types of feedback are “you’re doing great, keep doing what you’re doing”
or “you need to step it up” but without anything specific to improve. We need
to want candid feedback. If your boss does not automatically provide it, ask
for your “gift”. Just as important and as uncomfortable as it may seem, we need
to make sure we make bosses feel the feedback is desired and we are going to do
something with it.
The two
worst types of feedback are “you’re doing great, keep doing what you’re doing”
or “you need to step it up” but without anything specific to improve. We need
to want candid feedback. If your boss does not automatically provide it, ask
for your “gift”. Just as important and as uncomfortable as it may seem, we need
to make sure we make bosses feel the feedback is desired and we are going to do
something with it.
·
Most of
the times, we avoid defensive feedback. In fact, growth lies in constructive
feedback.
Most of
the times, we avoid defensive feedback. In fact, growth lies in constructive
feedback.
·
Mostly
I sought feedback from folks who gives good feedback. That did not help me to
grow.
Mostly
I sought feedback from folks who gives good feedback. That did not help me to
grow.
·
Org.
follows 360 degree feedback is a way of shaping ourselves.
Org.
follows 360 degree feedback is a way of shaping ourselves.
·
Even if
it is 1% true, take the feedback and work on that 1%.
Even if
it is 1% true, take the feedback and work on that 1%.
·
We generally
try to shoot the messenger of the feedback. Instead thank them as they are
helping us to grow..
We generally
try to shoot the messenger of the feedback. Instead thank them as they are
helping us to grow..
·
Build relationships
so that if someone has a concern involving you, you’ll be the first, not the
last, to know.
Build relationships
so that if someone has a concern involving you, you’ll be the first, not the
last, to know.
·
Help those
around you to become your most effective coaches.
Help those
around you to become your most effective coaches.
·
Turn harsh
critics into strong allies.
Turn harsh
critics into strong allies.
·
Turn mistakes
into stepping stones for success.
Turn mistakes
into stepping stones for success.
·
If you
throw it away because you don’t like the wrapping you’ll never find the gift
and the wrapping is the words they use, the tone of voice and the expression on
their face.
If you
throw it away because you don’t like the wrapping you’ll never find the gift
and the wrapping is the words they use, the tone of voice and the expression on
their face.
Conclusion:-
Hamlet,
“Give every man thine ear, but few thy
voice; Take each man's censure, but reserve thy judgment.”
“Give every man thine ear, but few thy
voice; Take each man's censure, but reserve thy judgment.”
In other words, whatever they tell you take it but then go
off and sift through it decide what to keep and what’s not a value put that
aside.
off and sift through it decide what to keep and what’s not a value put that
aside.
Simiar to Gandhiji’s keep treasure of small pencil as a
biggest gift, let us take every feedback as a treasure of big gift to shape us
as Heroes.
biggest gift, let us take every feedback as a treasure of big gift to shape us
as Heroes.
தடை கல்லை படி கல்லாக மாத்த – let us take Where’s the gift in our
hands
hands
Videos:-
Where's the Gift-Nigel
Bristow
Bristow
About me:-
EP-0 - Who am I? - Rajesh
Narayanan
Narayanan
If you do not know me personally, you can check out
this video
this video
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