எல்லா ஹீரோக்களுக்கும் ஹீரோயின் களுக்கும் வணக்கம்.
I keep Steven covey
as a general theme. Individual episode can be viewed separately for any new
corner. Common Theme for the week (til today (22nd Nov)) -
Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood (Courtesy: Stephen Covey).
as a general theme. Individual episode can be viewed separately for any new
corner. Common Theme for the week (til today (22nd Nov)) -
Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood (Courtesy: Stephen Covey).
Paradigm:
Ineffective: I listen with the intent
to reply(in some way to Influence, to accomplish their own end)
to reply(in some way to Influence, to accomplish their own end)
Effective: I listen with the intent to understand
(Emphatic listening).
(Emphatic listening).
Priniciple:
To communicate effectively, we must
first understand each other.
first understand each other.
Behaviour
·
Diagnose
Before You Prescribe.
Diagnose
Before You Prescribe.
·
Listen
emphatically.
Listen
emphatically.
·
Seek to be
understood from the other’s perspective.
Seek to be
understood from the other’s perspective.
Result:
·
Greater
influence with others
Greater
influence with others
·
Solutions to
complex problems
Solutions to
complex problems
·
Clarity on
real issues
Clarity on
real issues
·
Faster
problem solving
Faster
problem solving
We all would have
seen the Movie Titanic. The captain saw a tip of iceberg whereas it was a
gigantic Ice Mountain inside. The ship collapsed due to Ice Mountain.
seen the Movie Titanic. The captain saw a tip of iceberg whereas it was a
gigantic Ice Mountain inside. The ship collapsed due to Ice Mountain.
Similar to it, we
all try to address the tip of iceberg in the conversations whereas each of us has
a huge mountain below the iceberg.
all try to address the tip of iceberg in the conversations whereas each of us has
a huge mountain below the iceberg.
How do we go
deeper?
deeper?
To go deeper in
conversations, Covey suggests – Five Levels of Listening.
conversations, Covey suggests – Five Levels of Listening.
35 Habit 5:
Seek First to Understand Then to be Understood - Part B - Five Levels of
Listening
Seek First to Understand Then to be Understood - Part B - Five Levels of
Listening
Lessons learnt from the video:-
Part
B – Five Levels of Listening
B – Five Levels of Listening
Listening
Continuum
Continuum
1.
Ignoring
Ignoring
a.
Not listen at all
Not listen at all
b.
Ignore somebody
Ignore somebody
c.
We’re just into our own world or whatever.
We’re just into our own world or whatever.
2.
Pretend to Listen.
Pretend to Listen.
a.
Pretending body language
Pretending body language
b.
Even mimicking responses of the last person’s
sentence.
Even mimicking responses of the last person’s
sentence.
3.
Selective Listening
Selective Listening
a.
Listening selective – selective hearing
Listening selective – selective hearing
b.
I agree with that – messages
I agree with that – messages
c.
Oh yeah messages
Oh yeah messages
d.
I know exactly what you mean messages.
I know exactly what you mean messages.
e.
I’ve a same kind of exp.
I’ve a same kind of exp.
f.
Your mind is into your so hot buttons that you’re
listening always in terms of those buttons and those interests but you did
understand
Your mind is into your so hot buttons that you’re
listening always in terms of those buttons and those interests but you did
understand
4.
Attentive listening
Attentive listening
a.
Giving full attention out of real sincerity that
takes a lot of energy really to attend to another but still you’re into your
head
Giving full attention out of real sincerity that
takes a lot of energy really to attend to another but still you’re into your
head
5.
Empathic listening
Empathic listening
a.
To leave your head and get into their head and their
heart
To leave your head and get into their head and their
heart
b.
You are not playing to sympathize
You are not playing to sympathize
c.
Agree or disagree you take no position at all.
Agree or disagree you take no position at all.
d.
Empathy in communication
Empathy in communication
e.
Deeper attitude
Deeper attitude
f.
Deeper motive
Deeper motive
g.
Magic really comes from the human affirmation
process
Magic really comes from the human affirmation
process
The psychological
equivalent of air is to feel understood.
equivalent of air is to feel understood.
- To feel understood is the deepest hunger of the
human heart. - It feeds a person’s spirit it’s so nourishes and
nurtures that they become open non-defensive - Everyone’s life is so singular so unique
- Who is going to listen to the uniqueness?
Let’s have this week’s contest:-
Take one personal or professional relationship.
Follow 5 levels of listening – Empathetic listening
Other person has to give the certificate or you can give self-certificate
Top 3 winners will get books –
1.
First Prize :Lights from many lamps,
First Prize :Lights from many lamps,
2.
2nd
Prize : Alchemist,
2nd
Prize : Alchemist,
3.
3rd
Prize : Monk who sold his Ferrari
3rd
Prize : Monk who sold his Ferrari
Post your certificates in FB page:-
Complete
transcript of this video is available at
transcript of this video is available at
https://www.facebook.com/Zero-to-Hero-100-days-Personal-Transformation-Journey-109237953823208/
Listening Tips:- Use Talking Stick while having one to one discussion
either in personal or professional setting. This can be used in our daily
conversation with our spouses, teenage daughters/sons, brothers/sisters or with
our mom. This can be used in our team meeting as well.
either in personal or professional setting. This can be used in our daily
conversation with our spouses, teenage daughters/sons, brothers/sisters or with
our mom. This can be used in our team meeting as well.
When someone holds the talking stick,
everyone else listens fully without interrupting. Then the other person takes
the talking stick talks, and everyone else listens fully.
everyone else listens fully without interrupting. Then the other person takes
the talking stick talks, and everyone else listens fully.
Reference:-
Theme for the week: Seek
First to Understand Then to be Understood – Courtesy: Steven Covey’s 7
Habits of highly effective people.
First to Understand Then to be Understood – Courtesy: Steven Covey’s 7
Habits of highly effective people.
(Start Date 16th Nov, End date 22nd Nov –
Saturday to Friday)
Saturday to Friday)
Today’s Videos:-
35 Habit 5:
Seek First to Understand Then to be Understood - Part B - Five Levels of
Listening
Seek First to Understand Then to be Understood - Part B - Five Levels of
Listening
Week’s Video for quick reference.
7 Habits of
Highly Effective People - Habit 5 - Presented by Stephen Covey Himself (Longer
version for the whole week)
Highly Effective People - Habit 5 - Presented by Stephen Covey Himself (Longer
version for the whole week)
34 Habit 5:
Seek First to Understand Then to be Understood - Part A: Diagnose Before You Prescribe
Seek First to Understand Then to be Understood - Part A: Diagnose Before You Prescribe
Video: It's Not About the Nail (Must watch for every Husband/wife or every person) - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-4EDhdAHrOg
"Don't
try to fix it. I just need you to listen." Every man has heard these
words. And they are the law of the land. No matter what.
try to fix it. I just need you to listen." Every man has heard these
words. And they are the law of the land. No matter what.
Quote for the week to ponder upon:
One
friend, one person who is truly understanding, who takes the trouble to listen
to us as we consider our problem, can change our whole outlook on the world.
friend, one person who is truly understanding, who takes the trouble to listen
to us as we consider our problem, can change our whole outlook on the world.
-
Dr. Elton
Mayo
Dr. Elton
Mayo
Articles:-
HABIT 5: SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND, THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD
Books: 7 Habits of highly effective people – Stephen Covey
About me:-
EP-0 - Who am I? - Rajesh Narayanan
If you do not know me personally, you can check out this
video
video
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IiuvvMarwOE
No comments:
Post a Comment